What does it mean to long for something?

...It is a prolonged unfulfilled desire or need.

Do I long for Uganda and Charles Tucker?YES

I long to be able to live my life without thinking I might be on a plane at the end of the week. I long for our life to go back to normal, until it is time to go. I long for a yes or a no. I long to be able to enjoy the fall weather and think about all the fun holiday parties and things of Christmas. Who knows if we will even be here for Christmas or Thanksgiving? The in between is killing me. The minute I start feeling sorry for myself, the Lord reveals to me how broken the world really is and how our situation is not that bad at all. What is the situation anyway? Our soon to be son is in an amazing orphanage waiting on his soon to be family to come and bring him home. Is any one sick? NO. Is anyone dying? NO....SO WHY IS THIS SO DANG HARD?

What am I truly longing for anyway? Maybe I am longing for something to fulfill me that can't. I know I have gained about five pounds of brownie sundaes lately...yes, I am feeding my soul with food, or trying to find something to fill my thoughts of longing, something to make me happy. The Lord has definitely met me in this longing, but being human doesn't help. I have made a dust ruffle, appliqued a couple of shirts, printed off homeschool supplies and lessons, scheduled lots of play dates, volunteered to watch my friends kids, helped paint a room,etc. but I can't do enough activities to take my mind off this longing.

I am realizing all this longing is really a longing for the Lord. My hearts cry is to be made whole in the living God. Why can I not be content where he has me? I guess I am a sinner in a fallen world. Oh.. how I long to be made like Christ..fully!

How amazing would it be to LONG for the Lord like this! I guess the difference would be...I would be fulfilled in my longings, not left empty and wanting more. When you long for "real food," it does not disappoint.

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. Psalm 13:12

¹ As the deer longs for streams of water,
      so I long for you, O God.
 ² I thirst for God, the living God.
      When can I go and stand before him?
 ³ Day and night I have only tears for food,
      while my enemies continually taunt me, saying,
      “Where is this God of yours?”

 ⁴ My heart is breaking
      as I remember how it used to be:
   I walked among the crowds of worshipers,
      leading a great procession to the house of God,
   singing for joy and giving thanks
      amid the sound of a great celebration!

 ⁵ Why am I discouraged?
      Why is my heart so sad?
   I will put my hope in God!
      I will praise him again—
      my Savior and ⁶ my God!

   Now I am deeply discouraged,
      but I will remember you—
   even from distant Mount Hermon, the source of the Jordan,
      from the land of Mount Mizar.
 ⁷ I hear the tumult of the raging seas
      as your waves and surging tides sweep over me.
 ⁸ But each day the Lord pours his unfailing love upon me,
      and through each night I sing his songs,
      praying to God who gives me life.

 ⁹ “O God my rock,” I cry,
      “Why have you forgotten me?
   Why must I wander around in grief,
      oppressed by my enemies?”
 ¹⁰ Their taunts break my bones.
      They scoff, “Where is this God of yours?”

 ¹¹ Why am I discouraged?
      Why is my heart so sad?
   I will put my hope in God!
      I will praise him again—
      my Savior and my God! 

Psalm 42

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. 3Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

6You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. 7Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. 8But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.          Romans 5:1-8

Wow, scripture really is alive and active! I already see the Lord working in me through the time it has taken me to write this blog post. I believe this blog is truly for me, not everyone else. It is therapeutic! I hope you all are encouraged, for I know I am...at least right now. Remember...The christian life is a moment by moment, hour by hour, day by day journey of dependence on Christ. The Lord knows we were designed to worship him only.